The dictionary defines girlfriend as "a sweetheart of a boy or man; a girl who is ones best friend and/or the woman friend of a woman." Wow, that's it? Somebody call Webster's.

These days you need to include things like your connection to reality; the person or people that seem to know what you need before you do; the people that will sit up and talk to you until 4am. These are your backups. They understand you, love you, are honest with you, instead of dishing you BS, will be there when no one else is. Does that sound like your girlfriends? I hope so, for your sake. This is absolutely one of life's necessities.

Have you noticed the girlfriend revolution? How important "Girlfriends" have become. We would like to think we have always known, but the truth is we haven't. It has not always been so easy to define.

Think about elementary school for a minute. You go into kindergarten and usually, if you are a girl, you have a best friend within days. This is the one you have to sit next to, play dolls with, hold hands going anywhere in that big scary school. You can't wait to come back to school the next day. This works for a few years.

Along about third grade you discover boys. Not like they didn't exist before, but somehow it's just different. They are completely oblivious to this by the way. Very shortly, they will come to the conclusion that you are just "weird". That is where the problem seems to start. They treat you the same as always, but somehow it seems different. You and Sally were best friends yesterday. Today, for some reason, when Tommy said hi to her and not you, this became a problem. How did that happen? I have no idea. But, I think it has something to do with role models and hormones. We see it all around us growing up even if we aren't aware of it. You can't blame your mother, Aunt or even your grandmother. This goes way back and way beyond them. Mix that with the female hormones and look out.

So why the change? Why all of a sudden is it not only OK to have Girlfriends, but a necessity? That is the reason ladies. It is a necessity. In every area of your life, this addition is needed in the worst way.

1) Emotionally - Doesn't it just make sense to have someone in your life that can understand that sometimes you are just sad? And yes, crying does make me feel better!

2) Physically - I am sure she has issues with a body part here and there. Who else would understand not getting in your swimsuit and going to the pool in 97 degree weather?

3) Psychologically - We just think differently. We always have, we always will. She understands why you get annoyed when your other half doesn't take the laundry downstairs on his way to his car.

4) Romantically - Who else will you bounce things off of? Who else will get just as excited over your plans as you? This way you can be doubly annoyed when he misses the whole point.

So who are they? Who are the Girlfriends in your life that you just can't live without? Have you really thought about it? Do they deserve to be there? Do you deserve to have them? I would like to give you a starting point. Hint....it is not necessarily the ones you party with all the time. As fun as they may be, they may not have your best interest at heart. So don't confuse an acquaintance or friend with a "girlfriend". Here's a little help.

• Is she one of the first people you need to call when something happens? Good or Bad?

• Is she your weekend buddy (without makeup)?

• Is she honest with you.....always?

• Does she give you advice whether you like it or not, but does not get upset if you don't take it? (This is a biggy.)

• Do you not have to censor your thoughts and/or opinions with her?

• Does she make you feel safe?

• Are you sure she will be there through thick and thin without question?

How did your girlfriends do? For me, in order to be my Girlfriend, you have to meet those requirements. ALL of them. This is not a test nor is it a private club. It is my life. It's your life too, so treat it with the care and consideration that you deserve to have. If you don't who will? Be good to yourself and only surround yourself with people that believe you are worth it.

For those that have a "spouse" or a facsimile of one, a girlfriend is a totally different ballgame. Girlfriends support, they don't try to fix. Your partner just wants to fix it and be done with it. You know......change the channel?

In High School, the guy meant everything. You were expected to blow off your girlfriends if at the last minute you got a date. No one liked it when it happened to them but, if the tables were turned you would do the same thing.

Girlfriend rule.....should you lose your mind and find yourself dialing the phone to cancel on your girlfriend because of a "date", she has the right, at a later time, to lecture you AND you must sit there and take it without complaint.

Girlfriend rules are basic in nature and should be geared to you, but, they should also have some basics. Do unto others (you know the rest), be honest but with love and always take care to protect not only yourself but the people that you love. One more thing; leave the judgement behind. It serves no purpose.

If it is not screamingly apparent to you, I love my girlfriends. I couldn't survive without them. They are the most amazing women you could meet and I thank god for them every day. They are each unique and totally amazing in their own way. They are beautiful, inside and out, and giving in a way that boggles the mind.

"Girlfriends are the charms of our life. We collect them for their meaning and beauty and create an heirloom uniquely our own." Be creative.