When you don't feel for the other person what you used to feel, or when you realize that you never really felt anything for them, but that you only had the impression that they were somehow special and ideal for you, you have to put an end to the relationship.

Without love, what are you doing with him or her? Just living together? If you feel alone while you are with that supposedly special person, you had better really stay alone, and be free to find the right person for you.

Now, the other person loves you. They are "going to die" if you abandon them, and things like that. How can you leave them without being insensitive, rude and cruel?

Of course, you have the right to be free, even if you are married. You can get a divorce. Many times this is necessary, even though we should avoid it if possible.

If you are free and you are simply having a romance, or you are engaged, things are much easier.

If you are married and, especially if you have kids, things are totally different. You have to wait and care about the kids above all. You have to be very serious and responsible. But, you are not a slave. Today, a divorce is a very simple matter, apart from the pain it causes to everyone. At least you are not obliged to bear the mistake you made in getting married when you were too young, for the rest of your life. You are not a prisoner.

I advise you to think carefully about your decisions if you are free, because when you get married things are different from the time when you didn't have obligations. With the wedding, various complications start in your life.

This is why today it is very common to see couples that simply live together instead of getting married.

However, if you want to have a family, you need a wedding. You have to enter into the pattern and follow the rituals, otherwise your relationship will not be as stable. On the other hand, nothing is stable, and perhaps another kind of relationship could be better. There is no recipe for success... Each case is different.

If you want to separate after living with a person for so long, things are very hard, even if you are not married. In this case, you probably feel that your relationship is routine, with no excitement, and this is why you want to be free. If you live with your companion as if you have been married for years, without actually being married, then it's time to wake up and ask yourself if this is what you want from your relationship.

You are tired and you don't know if you love the other person or not. If you have such doubt after many years, this is probably because you don't really love them.

Now, if you have such doubts after a short period of time, things are not so definite. Are you sure you really don't like them? Or are you simply sad, disappointed, and wanting to get rid of the feeling you feel for them? Be sure before you do anything.

If you are sure you want to separate from this person, be sincere. Don't keep them waiting and waiting for a special occasion, the right moment, a favourable situation etc. You have to be delicate but also objective. If you have made your decision, you must advise the other party without delaying forever, because then, when you do find the right person for you, you will suddenly abandon them and this will be considered a betrayal.

If you are not with the person that is supposedly your love, then define your position, because your heart is free and could belong to somebody else, while you are still in the problematic relationship, and then things will be complicated.

You had better tell them what is happening to you. First tell them, and wait. Continue to be with them for a while, as if nothing had happened.

Then, after a few days, talk about this matter again. Explain to them your feelings, ideas, plans, beliefs, everything. Talk with them for hours about everything. Feel sad because this is happening to you both or pretend to be sad if you are not, only because you will hurt the other person if you are cold, and tell them that you want to be free "right now".

Don't fight with them, don't blame them for anything and don't talk about the past or other situations that could get you off the subject.

Be kind and gentle. Tell them that you are going to miss them, but that you need to be alone, that you don't feel good about your relationship. Perhaps it's your fault, perhaps you will meet them again in the future and you'll be together again, but you don't want to continue right now.

You need air, space, freedom and meditation.