Thursday, March 27, 2008
Golden Rules of Being a Fabulous FriendBy Francheska Saunders
Fashion guru, punching bag, unlimited call partner, shoulder to cry on -- what else can a friend do for you? These are few of the duties a friend can do. But what else can we do for a friend besides from being the rag to drag around?
We usually find ourselves giggling in coffee shops, hanging out at the mall, and having the sleepovers. But is it enough to be called a fabulous friend? Here are some tips to improve or have a better relationship with your friends.
• Admit the Humiliating Truth
Tell a friend about the Ungodly truth about yourself, it's a requirement mostly in women. Women can be mistrustful and unless you reveal the naked truth about your juicy past, a woman may never trust you. Invite a friend, grab some beer and confide! At first, it may seem awkward but after a while the trust will fill the air and the other will spill the sickest thing about him/her as well. Both having known the dirt of each other will help you encourage to trust one another.
• Dating her EX?
Remember to only date her EX if the following applies:
1. The relationship they had wasn't serious, no "I Love You's" involved.
2. The person you're dating isn't the recent one he/she had.
3. If he/she met someone else.
4. And make sure his/her "someone else" is much hotter than the EX.
But it is better to avoid dating an EX. Even though your friend tells you that it's so over and it's okay, there will still be a question inside their head. They'll be asking themselves why you, and why not him/her. There will always be a comparison of why your relationship with the EX worked out, and not with them. You'll just end up hurting someone and will have to choose between a friend and a lover.
• Be the "Nice" Mirror
A lot of women usually ask if they gained weight or if they still look gorgeous. A lot of us would lie and say "Nah, you're in great shape" but knowing the truth that they did gain weight. A true friend should tell the truth even if it would hurt, but say it in a subtle way. And remember to offer to be the gym buddy or her stylist.
• Never Take Advantage
The difference between a comfy couch and making your friend a doormat is the way you'll be treating them. Don't take advantage of the person even if it's alright with them. Always make sure that it would still be a give and take relationship and not just take and take.
• Endure at least 10 hours Per Month to Hear Out Obsessions
Getting sick of the yada yada stories about the recent break-up, a new crush, work-related problems, or even tell you the detailed stories about his/her sex life? Next time tell your friend in a nice way that you like hearing things about what is happening with his/her life but you also would prefer to keep some stuff to their selves.
• Be the Air Bag during an Embarrassing Moment
Instead of laughing, be the airbag that a friend would need. Try to lessen the trauma of embarrassment.
• Never Leave a Friend Dangling
Always be there for a friend in times of needs. Even if you had to work the next morning without sleeping at all, then do it. It's not as if she bothers you almost every night to be her pillow. Give the time he/she would need to recover and give assurances that everything will be just fine.
• Judgment Call, Ditch it!
Forget the word "I told you so" when a friend runs back to you after taking an advise and doing the total opposite of it. You're still a friend so try to understand, although you're sick of it, still do comfort your friend. He/She will do the same with you.
• Treat a Friend
Make sure you have the proper bonding time without anyone else. No partners around. Plan a vacation or a trip that includes only the two of you. Go to a beach, eat out, hang out at the café, or go on a tour.
• Never Wave your Triumph
Although you have the Bragger's right, never wave your triumph in a friends face. Remember if something comes up, like a promotion, something beautiful happened in your life, you won a trip Paris or you found the love of your life, share it with a friend first. A friend will be most proud and happy for you.
I'm Cheska, currently my goal is to be a fashion designer or even a fashion icon. I am into modeling because I love what the models do. I always wanted to go to Europe, but so far, I only have traveled different states of the America.
http://francheskasaunders.multiply.com/
Go To Loverian Home PageCan Men be Friends With Their Ex-girlfriends?
By Chris Dreyer
Most people dread the phrase "can we just be friends" as it usually signifies the end of a relationship. While this question is one of the classic breakup lines, it is a statement that should be carefully considered before embarking on the relationship to friendship transition. Before jumping blindly from a relationship to a friendship there are many important things to consider and you should be fully prepared to manage the relationship differently without getting your feelings hurt.
Before you commit to "just being friends" you should evaluate your intentions and make sure you are not setting yourself up for disaster. Remaining friends with an ex who was a friend before, or remaining friends because you have a genuine connection and shared interests are good reasons to make the transition. Being friends with an ex in hopes that you will get back together, or to keep tabs on then or to seek revenge are reasons that will certainly lead to disaster. If you have good intentions and a genuine connection with your ex then pursuing a friendship can be a good idea.
You should also consider the value of your ex's friendship and make sure they will add value to your life. Neither of you will benefit if you remain friends for the wrong reasons. Too many people have friends and acquaintances that do not add any positive energy to their lives and it is important that you look at all of your ex's qualities and make sure they will positively impact your life. If your ex has traits that will not help you to be a happy and healthy person, then you will probably be better off without them. Make a mental list of all the good and bad qualities they possess and make sure their friendship will be a valuable and healthy one.
Going from boyfriend to friend can work, but if you focus too much on the friendship of harbor intentions other than platonic ones, you are setting yourself up for disaster. If you decide to go the friendship route you should make sure that you are not expecting anything more to happen. It is important to give yourself time to heal and move on, even if you are remaining friends with your ex. Don't rely too much on your friendship to help you heal, get out and do things, meet new people, and move on with your life.
If you do decide to be friends with your ex-girlfriend, make sure you set ground rules and then stick too them. Setting boundaries before you continue your relationship as friends will help you to avoid making mistakes that you will regret and will further complicate your friendship. If pursuing a friendship is important to both of you then you should both decide what types of interactions are appropriate and do your best to make sure that the lines you set are not crossed. Keeping your relationship positive and platonic is the key to success, so be sure to set the boundaries you both need to make this possible.
Click here to discover the most powerful technique to Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back
http://www.squidoo.com/how-to-get-an-ex-girlfriend-back
Go To Loverian Home PageLove, Its Qualities And Goals
By Abraham Adar
Love is a value; a feeling; a unique, basic, vital energy, of great intensity, instilled within us by the Creator. It is a creative energy, which creates, develops and motivates our every positive activity. It is our spiritual spring. It is the most impressive gift, granted us by our Creator. According to the philosophers of ancient Greece, love is the energy that created and moves the universe and all that it contains. According to God's words in "Kriat Shema" (a Jewish prayer, based on Deuteronomy 6: 4-9) love will extend man's days on Earth for eternity. I allow myself to add that love is the energy that brings us to properly express Good and in doing so, to realize our purpose.
God's special emphasis on love and His numerous attempts to convince us to realize it, point to its great significance, but also to our basic problem in expressing it.
Love is also a unique, and necessary, spiritual nourishment. It is the 'glue' that stabilizes our spirituality, in order to function in a natural and efficient manner. It could be said that most people hunger for this food.
Love also neutralizes many of our negative phenomena and induces happiness, peace, harmony, confidence, trust, encouragement, unity and so forth. Love is also the means, which leads us to find Good everywhere. It is the most efficient tool for bringing people closer; bringing with it a daring to approach the other to grant him assistance, protection and primarily, the most sought-after and precious thing - love. It is also the most efficient means of approaching God.
True love stands behind acts of love, such as: assistance, mercy, forgiveness, recognition, esteem, protection, care, sympathy and consideration. It is the tool which transforms a defenseless baby into an emotionally mature adult, capable of dealing with most of life's challenges. Human beings are attracted to each other, primarily because of their giving and receiving that unique energy called love.
When you turn to someone with genuine love, you cannot simultaneously act against him. You can only act to benefit him. I presume some of you have experienced this wonderful phenomenon.
God's creation of the universe is an expression of Good, and is therefore an expression of love. And, as we shall see later on, it is an expression of love at infinite intensity, which is why every detail of this creation, including man, is essentially positive and was created to express Good. It can therefore be said that His "Word" is an inseparable part of that creation, and hence, is also an expression of love.
Every positive act is more perfectly performed when it is accompanied with love. Most of us recognize the importance of love between a man and a woman in building their future, in the success of the sexual act and the degree of its fertility. The root cause of a man's impotence and of a woman's frigidity lies, among other things, in a difficulty in the expression of mutual love. This phenomenon is not unique to man. A connection of love can be recognized in other animals' fertility and survival, even much more dramatically than in mankind. It is so marvelous to discover love in birds, in the cooperation between the male and the female in building their nest and raising their chicks.
It can therefore be said that love is amongst the most important of our spiritual means and perhaps the most important one of all.
The author is a Holocaust survivor and has resided in Israel since 1948. In his book and website, http://www.adar-publishing.com, he expresses concern regarding the dangers which ambush Man today, as well as to the continuous rampant "Jewish tragedy" .
His sensitivity to Man's fundamental problems and the genuine need to find a proper and efficient solution to these problems, have lead him to present humanity this unique way of life.
Go To Loverian Home PageState Of Love - The Suitable State Of Consciousness For Receiving And Granting Love
By Abraham Adar
In order to receive and transmit true love, we must be in a suitable consciousness; one in which conditions like unity and inner harmony with ourselves and our surroundings are fulfilled, and primarily with the subject to whom we beam our love. This is the consciousness in which only Good is performed. We shall refer to it as "love consciousness" or as the "love state".
It is remarkably similar to the Alpha state, with which we are familiar. It could be said that the love state is a more elevated one due to its high capacity for expressing love. One of the special methods of entering the love state is in giving genuine love to the other. If you can express love towards the other every time you encounter him, whether in reality or in your imagination, you will have created an efficient method of quickly entering this special consciousness. Due to the inability to perform anything negative while being in the state of love, it inherently represents a suitable soil for the creation and development of the most exalted capabilities.
Already some 2500 years ago, the Greek philosophers defined a lover's wondrous quality, according to which the true lover is the one who enables Good to rule him, something that can only occur in a state of love, since it is only in that state that these conditions exist. Being in a state of exuding and receiving love most of our time, means being in the natural state, God created and designed us to be in. This consciousness is also among the most important and marvelous gifts bestowed on us.
The author is a Holocaust survivor and has resided in Israel since 1948. In his book and website, http://www.adar-publishing.com, he expresses concern regarding the dangers which ambush Man today, as well as to the continuous rampant "Jewish tragedy" .
His sensitivity to Man's fundamental problems and the genuine need to find a proper and efficient solution to these problems, have lead him to present humanity this unique way of life.
Go To Loverian Home PagePlato's Erotic Love
By Abraham Adar
Love is the constant wish of reaching Good. A person is always in a state of striving for something, in which Good is present. Therefore, it is love that provides man with the motivation for his actions. Plato believed that everything in the universe aspires to attain Good. Thus, the entire universe is in a continuous state of love. He continues: It is love, which causes the world to exist; without love, nothing could exist. Every person is, in a certain sense, a type of lover. Few know the object of their love, which motivates their aspirations and forms the foundation of all their wishes.
Since all things in the universe form a single unit, the highest object of love must also be One. The philosopher named this object "absolute Good" or "absolute Beauty". To Love this Beauty and Good is the most exalted love, nearing you to immortality.
The Greeks of that era also bestowed Beauty and Good with the role of Harmony - things shall not collide if they are Good.
Whatever is truly beautiful must also be good, and whatever is truly good must also be beautiful. Whoever recognizes an ugly person's goodness, will also recognize his beauty. A person cannot attain beauty if he is not good. Hence, a person's highest wish would be that Good and Beauty be present within him throughout his entire life, and this is, in effect, what each of us is looking for.
The philosopher notes that the true lover is that person who has torn away his shackles, left Socrates' "cave of shadows" and entered the true world.
Notes: The aspiration for unity mentioned earlier refers to a reunion with something that had been separated in the distant past.
Summary: Platonic love is a form of intellectual love, at a high level, yet lacking feelings of love. This is the doctrine's principal flaw.
The author is a Holocaust survivor and has resided in Israel since 1948. In his book and website, http://www.adar-publishing.com, he expresses concern regarding the dangers which ambush Man today, as well as to the continuous rampant "Jewish tragedy" .
His sensitivity to Man's fundamental problems and the genuine need to find a proper and efficient solution to these problems, have lead him to present humanity this unique way of life.
Go To Loverian Home PageSaturday, March 22, 2008
"Love Springs Eternal" - Really? Did You Ever Wonder?By Sally C. Brown
What draws us towards each other? What do we really see reflected in others?
Is it simply a reflection of us?
Do we repel others because what we see we do not love in ourselves?
Wonder, wonder... We are what we are... We believe what we want to believe
Someone once told me in confidence after the loss of her friend that she was not mourning over the death of her friend, but for the absence of what she had experienced so often in her presence.... She would no longer be able to comfort that friend with her affection or receive her friend's attentions... wouldn't be able to tell her friend how much her gentle presence had meant to her...She said she treasured how much her friend saw in her... This friend had accepted her flaws and faults, in a word everything...She believes that this was an extraordinary find in a friend.... In a statement of awe and wonder she said that this friend had even found some of the rough sides of her character attractive!
She felt prized. Her friend didn't demand more than she was willing or able to share...
This friend's gentleness and generosity was blissfully poured out on her time after time. Upon reflection she told me her friend's example made her want to do the same thing for others...In this small manner... she thought she would give tribute to her friend's life. All that she received as a beneficiary would not be wasted. She would continue her friend's legacy to the world...in this way love would indeed "spring eternal"...
I am always surprised at such sensitivity ...clarity of expression and perception in others. This person has caught the essence of being human, of real exchanges of love with all of its imperfection, pain and empathy...Her friend's love spurs her on to make sure that the memory and reality of this experience is never lost...She embraces the goodness, the generosity and gentleness she found in her...In this way the good in the world continues to overcome the evil...
If each person were to extend what he or she learned or discovered in others...like the goodness, the beauty, the generosity, the virtue that exists somewhere in the best and worst of us... into their own daily practice of living and loving others in return...why there would be no end in sight to anyone's life!
It is like casting light into a tunnel, a net into the sea, shining candlelight into the darkness. We incorporate the good we see in others into our own behavior and so they live on through us... Life is passed along..-In a sense we become immortal and so do those we continue to love in the world....It is endless..."Love springs eternal"...
Website: www.effective-spiritual-parenting.com
Sally Brown, M.A., Sp. Director, is a trained educator and spiritual director. She has worked in the educational system for over forty years as an administrator, teacher, mentor and spiritual director. Her experience stretches from preschool, elementary and junior high school, high school, youth to adults. She has taught and given workshops in California, Texas, Louisiana, New Jersey, Florida, Colorado and in Italy. She was an associate of The New Life Institute for Human Development in Virginia and The Mercy Center in Colorado Springs, Colorado where she worked with men and women Catholic sisters and priests.
Website: http://www.effective-spiritual-parenting.com
Go To Loverian Home PageSetting the Stage for Love - Internet Relationships Part Two
By Kay Hutchinson
Is it possible to find love on the internet? Certainly. Originality, timeliness, depth and authenticity with early stages of of online communications play a role in developing the potential for love through online dating experiences.
Let us take a closer look at these factors.
Originality, Timeliness and Depth Counts
Let's face it. Many people exhibit a "cast the net wide and far " approach to online matching services. They send out the same introduction to a variety of people and answer all replies with "tell me more" regardless of what was expressed in the reply.
For instance Steve is a member of a popular online dating service. He sends Beth an introduction email. She sends a well developed response expressing that the interest is mutual.
Steve waits several days then writes, "Tell me more about you." He does not comment on anything specific that Beth has shared.
Beth writes back, "No thanks." Steve is puzzled by her response.
If you want to create an online interaction with the potential of developing a loving relationship off the computer, take the the time to individualize introductions, respond in a timely way and with depth.
Express Authenticity
Relationships that begin online and blossom into love have authenticity as a primary characteristic.
There are many single, unattached individuals online who say that they seek love and a long term relationship.
Yet, there are also a number of individuals who are married or otherwise attached who simply want to see what might be available in terms of temporary companionship.
Many people are forthright about their true status and intentionality. Others are not.
Simon laments that he can not find a suitable date or long term relationship partner. On his dating profile, he presents himself as a single, successful business owner seeking a long term relationship.
Yet, he does not mention that he is still married (separated), totally dependent on his spouse for financial support and emotionally still entwined in her life.
To attract love, make sure that who you are authentically matches what you present on your online profile.
Read other articles in this series of finding internet love by searching Kay Hutchinson's author profile at ezinearticles.com. Also, for further guidance on internet dating, contact Kay Hutchinson, CAMQ, CAMT. http://www.aikihealing.com
Kay Hutchinson is a practitioner of Chinese medicine, energetic life coach and teacher of qi gong movement. She is the founder of Aiki Healing, a private practice in Austin, Texas, and the publisher of "Health Prosperity" a publication dedicated to empowering people to manifest optimum health and wellness.
Join the Health Prosperity free mailing list today to receive these helpful strategies in your email box. http://www.aikihealing.com/healthprosperity/archives.html
Go To Loverian Home PageHaving Trouble Finding Friends - Here is Some Advice for You
By Lance Winslow
Many people who have trouble finding friends, tend to forget that each person is unique and that their combination of attributes, attitudes and perspectives are to be admired even if they do not fully gel with their own. As folks get older, they get jaded in many ways and they want to hang around others who think like they do; religiously, politically and share common values, beliefs, hobbies, lifestyles and economic classes. When it is all said and done that can be a relatively tall order.
Therefore it is far better to attempt to seek out uniqueness or people who are not like you and relish in their individuality and differences. If you take this approach you will find that everyone you meet will be a potential friend. And those few people who are just like you, well, you will have a common bond with them anyway, you can't help that.
Some people ask me, how come I have so many friends and why does everyone get along with me? Well, I tend not to judge, rather listen and learn. You learn a lot more from those who are different from you than all those people who have over the years of experience, education and observations finally come to your conclusions.
If every friend you have is just like you, you will not have many friends and you cannot grow listening to the same lines, talking points and clichés year in and year out. Thus, I recommend that you look for uniqueness in everyone you meet and you will discover more than you will ever know and discover you have more friends as you grow.
"Lance Winslow" - Online Think Tank forum board. If you have innovative thoughts and unique perspectives, come think with Lance; http://www.WorldThinkTank.net/.
Go To Loverian Home PageGolden Rules of Being a Fabulous Friend
By Francheska Saunders
Fashion guru, punching bag, unlimited call partner, shoulder to cry on -- what else can a friend do for you? These are few of the duties a friend can do. But what else can we do for a friend besides from being the rag to drag around?
We usually find ourselves giggling in coffee shops, hanging out at the mall, and having the sleepovers. But is it enough to be called a fabulous friend? Here are some tips to improve or have a better relationship with your friends.
• Admit the Humiliating Truth
Tell a friend about the Ungodly truth about yourself, it's a requirement mostly in women. Women can be mistrustful and unless you reveal the naked truth about your juicy past, a woman may never trust you. Invite a friend, grab some beer and confide! At first, it may seem awkward but after a while the trust will fill the air and the other will spill the sickest thing about him/her as well. Both having known the dirt of each other will help you encourage to trust one another.
• Dating her EX?
Remember to only date her EX if the following applies:
1. The relationship they had wasn't serious, no "I Love You's" involved.
2. The person you're dating isn't the recent one he/she had.
3. If he/she met someone else.
4. And make sure his/her "someone else" is much hotter than the EX.
But it is better to avoid dating an EX. Even though your friend tells you that it's so over and it's okay, there will still be a question inside their head. They'll be asking themselves why you, and why not him/her. There will always be a comparison of why your relationship with the EX worked out, and not with them. You'll just end up hurting someone and will have to choose between a friend and a lover.
• Be the "Nice" Mirror
A lot of women usually ask if they gained weight or if they still look gorgeous. A lot of us would lie and say "Nah, you're in great shape" but knowing the truth that they did gain weight. A true friend should tell the truth even if it would hurt, but say it in a subtle way. And remember to offer to be the gym buddy or her stylist.
• Never Take Advantage
The difference between a comfy couch and making your friend a doormat is the way you'll be treating them. Don't take advantage of the person even if it's alright with them. Always make sure that it would still be a give and take relationship and not just take and take.
• Endure at least 10 hours Per Month to Hear Out Obsessions
Getting sick of the yada yada stories about the recent break-up, a new crush, work-related problems, or even tell you the detailed stories about his/her sex life? Next time tell your friend in a nice way that you like hearing things about what is happening with his/her life but you also would prefer to keep some stuff to their selves.
• Be the Air Bag during an Embarrassing Moment
Instead of laughing, be the airbag that a friend would need. Try to lessen the trauma of embarrassment.
• Never Leave a Friend Dangling
Always be there for a friend in times of needs. Even if you had to work the next morning without sleeping at all, then do it. It's not as if she bothers you almost every night to be her pillow. Give the time he/she would need to recover and give assurances that everything will be just fine.
• Judgment Call, Ditch it!
Forget the word "I told you so" when a friend runs back to you after taking an advise and doing the total opposite of it. You're still a friend so try to understand, although you're sick of it, still do comfort your friend. He/She will do the same with you.
• Treat a Friend
Make sure you have the proper bonding time without anyone else. No partners around. Plan a vacation or a trip that includes only the two of you. Go to a beach, eat out, hang out at the café, or go on a tour.
• Never Wave your Triumph
Although you have the Bragger's right, never wave your triumph in a friends face. Remember if something comes up, like a promotion, something beautiful happened in your life, you won a trip Paris or you found the love of your life, share it with a friend first. A friend will be most proud and happy for you.
I'm Cheska, currently my goal is to be a fashion designer or even a fashion icon. I am into modeling because I love what the models do. I always wanted to go to Europe, but so far, I only have traveled different states of the America.
http://francheskasaunders.multiply.com/
Go To Loverian Home PageKnow What You Have
By ME Williams
Everybody has heard, "You never know what you have until you lose it." Even in Spanish "Nunca sabes lo que tienes hasta lo que pierdes" makes things pretty clear.....if you speak Spanish, that is. The point is that you should celebrate the things that are special to you each and every day. In my case today's celebration is of three people who, even though they are far away from me on the map, are great friends and very close to my heart.
Because of my life's wanderings, I found myself in Raleigh, North Carolina for about ten years. A great city, Raleigh was where I met Ron Brown. "Mr. Brown" as I usually call him, started out as a co-worker but became a truly great friend. Rarely in this life have I had someone that I felt I could count on no matter what happened, but Mr. Brown is that kind of person. No matter whether I need a favor or a well-timed, albeit good-natured insult to keep me grounded, Mr. Brown is really the kind of friend that everyone wishes they had.
Another treasure that I uncovered at the same workplace was a burly West Virginian named Mike Bell. This guy is as country as going barefoot or picking the banjo, but that country side blended perfectly with his common sense and Christian values to give me the kind of counselor I probably always needed. Mike teamed up with Mr. Brown to make sure that "el guapo" never got too far out of control!
Teresa Manns is the other incredible discovery I made while I was in Raleigh. If I ever found a friend that was more like a soul mate, Teresa is that person. You wouldn't think it to look at us, but "Slim Tee" is like my twin sister from a different mother. We just connect and even if we don't talk for a while I know that one phone call and it's just like old times. Teresa is one of those people that I believe can do anything she chooses and I don't think there is anything in this world that stand in her way.
Some people don't know what they have until they lose it. Even though I am not in Raleigh anymore, I am not one of those people. I have three incredible friends and I will never forget how truly blessed I am for that. It's been said that a true friend is a treasure and if that is true, I am much wealthier in this life than Bill Gates or anyone else with money could ever be.
http://www.mewenterprises.com is being developed to promote the interests and activities of MEW Enterprises and Michael E Williams.
Go To Loverian Home PageSunday, March 16, 2008
Girlfriend GenerationBy Cindy Penkoff
The dictionary defines girlfriend as "a sweetheart of a boy or man; a girl who is ones best friend and/or the woman friend of a woman." Wow, that's it? Somebody call Webster's.
These days you need to include things like your connection to reality; the person or people that seem to know what you need before you do; the people that will sit up and talk to you until 4am. These are your backups. They understand you, love you, are honest with you, instead of dishing you BS, will be there when no one else is. Does that sound like your girlfriends? I hope so, for your sake. This is absolutely one of life's necessities.
Have you noticed the girlfriend revolution? How important "Girlfriends" have become. We would like to think we have always known, but the truth is we haven't. It has not always been so easy to define.
Think about elementary school for a minute. You go into kindergarten and usually, if you are a girl, you have a best friend within days. This is the one you have to sit next to, play dolls with, hold hands going anywhere in that big scary school. You can't wait to come back to school the next day. This works for a few years.
Along about third grade you discover boys. Not like they didn't exist before, but somehow it's just different. They are completely oblivious to this by the way. Very shortly, they will come to the conclusion that you are just "weird". That is where the problem seems to start. They treat you the same as always, but somehow it seems different. You and Sally were best friends yesterday. Today, for some reason, when Tommy said hi to her and not you, this became a problem. How did that happen? I have no idea. But, I think it has something to do with role models and hormones. We see it all around us growing up even if we aren't aware of it. You can't blame your mother, Aunt or even your grandmother. This goes way back and way beyond them. Mix that with the female hormones and look out.
So why the change? Why all of a sudden is it not only OK to have Girlfriends, but a necessity? That is the reason ladies. It is a necessity. In every area of your life, this addition is needed in the worst way.
1) Emotionally - Doesn't it just make sense to have someone in your life that can understand that sometimes you are just sad? And yes, crying does make me feel better!
2) Physically - I am sure she has issues with a body part here and there. Who else would understand not getting in your swimsuit and going to the pool in 97 degree weather?
3) Psychologically - We just think differently. We always have, we always will. She understands why you get annoyed when your other half doesn't take the laundry downstairs on his way to his car.
4) Romantically - Who else will you bounce things off of? Who else will get just as excited over your plans as you? This way you can be doubly annoyed when he misses the whole point.
So who are they? Who are the Girlfriends in your life that you just can't live without? Have you really thought about it? Do they deserve to be there? Do you deserve to have them? I would like to give you a starting point. Hint....it is not necessarily the ones you party with all the time. As fun as they may be, they may not have your best interest at heart. So don't confuse an acquaintance or friend with a "girlfriend". Here's a little help.
• Is she one of the first people you need to call when something happens? Good or Bad?
• Is she your weekend buddy (without makeup)?
• Is she honest with you.....always?
• Does she give you advice whether you like it or not, but does not get upset if you don't take it? (This is a biggy.)
• Do you not have to censor your thoughts and/or opinions with her?
• Does she make you feel safe?
• Are you sure she will be there through thick and thin without question?
How did your girlfriends do? For me, in order to be my Girlfriend, you have to meet those requirements. ALL of them. This is not a test nor is it a private club. It is my life. It's your life too, so treat it with the care and consideration that you deserve to have. If you don't who will? Be good to yourself and only surround yourself with people that believe you are worth it.
For those that have a "spouse" or a facsimile of one, a girlfriend is a totally different ballgame. Girlfriends support, they don't try to fix. Your partner just wants to fix it and be done with it. You know......change the channel?
In High School, the guy meant everything. You were expected to blow off your girlfriends if at the last minute you got a date. No one liked it when it happened to them but, if the tables were turned you would do the same thing.
Girlfriend rule.....should you lose your mind and find yourself dialing the phone to cancel on your girlfriend because of a "date", she has the right, at a later time, to lecture you AND you must sit there and take it without complaint.
Girlfriend rules are basic in nature and should be geared to you, but, they should also have some basics. Do unto others (you know the rest), be honest but with love and always take care to protect not only yourself but the people that you love. One more thing; leave the judgement behind. It serves no purpose.
If it is not screamingly apparent to you, I love my girlfriends. I couldn't survive without them. They are the most amazing women you could meet and I thank god for them every day. They are each unique and totally amazing in their own way. They are beautiful, inside and out, and giving in a way that boggles the mind.
"Girlfriends are the charms of our life. We collect them for their meaning and beauty and create an heirloom uniquely our own." Be creative.
You have just read excerpts of the book "Girlfriend Generation" it is fun and meaningful all at the same time. This book is meant to be shared. The perfect friend gift, with plenty of areas inside to add your own love. Great for all the women in your life. At the end, a journal, for the owner to share with herself. Are you a good Girlfriend? Not to your other half, to the women in your life. Women's friendships have changed dramatically over the past few years. This is a little walk down memory lane, with the concentration on the here, the now and the who. Who are your Girlfriends? Do they deserve you? Do you deserve them? An easy read with lots of common sense thrown in. Your reaction may surprise you.
To order or download the book please go to http://www.lulu.com/content/2155279 You can also go to my website at http://www.girlfriendgeneration.com
My name is Cindy Penkoff, I live in Connecticut and I am 44 years old. This is my first attempt at writing anything that I wanted someone else to read. I have been married for a very long time and have one son. Both of these men I adore. If you would like to know more about me please check out the following article recently done http://ladyinthespotlight.8m.net/whats_new_29.html Thanks for your time.
Go To Loverian Home PageSilver and Gold - Make New Friends, Keep Good Friends
By Tina Tessina
"Make new friends, keep the old. One is silver, the other is gold."-- adage
Research shows that the happiest and healthiest people are those who are well-connected to friends and family. But, in our mobile society, keeping friends is not always possible.First, consider what being a friend means to you. Who are your best friends? What qualities do they have? Once you have a clear idea of the kinds of friendships you would enjoy, you can decide to create more of them in your life. This can be done in two ways:
• Make changes in your current relationships ask your friends to participate in activities you enjoy, and spend more time with the friends whose style of friendship best complements your own.
• Create new friendships -- Reach out to coworkers, your neighbors or church members and invite them to accompany you in a favorite activity or for coffee. As an alternative, you may want to join a discussion group focused on literature, film, or painting, or take a class in yoga, or cooking. If you spend time with people who have similar interests, you will soon create new friends.
If you find that you don't have enough friends, here are some guidelines for making new ones. Of course, you can tailor these suggestions to your personal tastes.
1. Get a life. If you want to meet people with whom you have something in common, do things on a regular basis that involve others. Activities can range from taking classes, joining hobby clubs, volunteering, playing a sport or game, hiking, or any pursuit that meets regularly. The people you meet will share your interest, and you'll have something to talk about and enjoy together.
2. Find interesting, fun people. Being involved in an ongoing activity, and meeting with the same people on a regular basis gives you a chance to get to know them before you decide to pursue a more personal relationship. When you find someone you think is particularly pleasant, spend a little time talking with him or her during or after your activity. Ask questions about the project you are working on, or share experiences and advice. If you both enjoy the conversation, goes well, you can offer to meet before or after the session for coffee. From there, you can begin do more things together, until you've established a pattern of friendship.
3. Don't overlook people you know. While you're making new friends, don't forget the people you already know. Is there a favorite family member you'd like to see more often? Call him or her and suggest going for a walk, or to lunch. Are there acquaintances at work, at church, in your neighborhood, involved in your child's ( or your own) school, or elsewhere with whom you could develop a friendship? Consider reaching out to them. Let these people know that you'd like to share events and activities.
Spending quality time with friends is beneficial to your emotional, mental and physical health. If you follow the above steps, you'll find that it isn't as difficult as you think to make friends.(Adapted from The Ten Smartest Decisions a Woman Can Make After Forty (c)Tessina, 2001)
Author Bio:
Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D. http://www.tinatessina.com is a licensed psychotherapist in S. California, with over 30 years experience in counseling individuals and couples and author of 11 books, including It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction (New Page); How to Be a Couple and Still Be Free (New Page); The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again (Wiley) and The Real 13th Step: Discovering Self-Confidence, Self-Reliance and Independence Beyond the Twelve Step Programs (New Page.) Her newest books, out from Adams Press in 2008: Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting About the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage and Commuter Marriage. She publishes Happiness Tips from Tina, an e-mail newsletter, and the "Dr. Romance Blog" http://drromance.typepad.com/dr_romance_blog/ and has hosted "The Psyche Deli: delectable tidbits for the subconscious" a weekly hour long radio show. She is an online expert, answering relationship questions at http://www.CouplesCompany.com and Yahoo!Personals, as well as a Redbook Love Network expert and "Psychology Smarts" columnist for First for Women.Dr. Tessina guests frequently on radio, and on such TV shows as "Oprah", "LarryKing Live" and ABC news
Go To Loverian Home PageLove, Red Roses and Champagne
By Thomas Cummins
A soft red rose and a bottle of champagne
set against white clouds of silk forever embedded in my brain
Yellow wrapping of glistening bright material
setting this scene that is almost surreal
Love flowing through the quiet air
looking at you with your golden blonde hair
Where is there to be another who is complete
in all my life none did I ever meet.
Klinking our glasses to share this moment
a history come alive in a true love lament.
Mind goes dizzy with this feeling I have for you
lost in the haze created within your eyes of a soft sensitive hue.
Red roses for a treasured love
Champagne to celebrate the unity thereof.
Celebrating loves value with the love you cherish is definitely never a waste of time, energies or expense. It is remarkable to see couples sharing a quiet walk in a park, at the beach or even walking slowly down the street arm in arm.
When you decide that life is too important to take the time to spend quality moments with the love of your life you have just lost the very love you wanted more than anything else at one time or other. We need to take our lives back from the heavy demands of work and we need to express our values more so they will be heard and appreciated and recognized, plus the added advantage of fighting off temptations and adversaries.
In the movie The Knights of The South Bronx Ted Danson's character is having a conversation with the mother of one of the kids he is teaching and his wife is looking at him with such love in her eyes that one cannot miss it. As they are driving home she tells him as much and at this point was glad to have her husband back who had been stolen by the rigors of work. How many spouses, partners and parents are being stolen right now by the demands of work and how many kids have once again been saddened that their parent broke another promise because of work?
Developing the habit of extra hours all in the name of duty for work is common place and unfortunately companies exploit this behaviour and for the benefit of family life it does not behoove the essence of love to continue in this way.
Work is a vehicle that enables us to enjoy the things and the people who matter to us and is not the main reason of our existence and when we accept that our families are more important we then live more in harmony and balance with the laws of attraction and enjoy the blessings of our labors.
To live as a prince or princess is fine and dandy in a book or movie but the reality of life has many demands for the mere mortals we are and as such we have to make a concerted effort to express our love that the characters in the movies do so eloquently and liberally.
Your spouse is your prince or your princess who in your sparkling eyes enhanced with the love you know no matter the time or day or the garbs they are clothed in or not. To love is to know the essence of the person to whom you are captivated and when the chores are completed and the work day is over you guys have to face off and if love is true this will be a harmonious event.
The metaphor of red roses and champagne will serve to be an example of enjoying the simple things of life and celebrating that your life is filled with the love you have consciously decided to cherish. God bless you.
Thomas J. Cummins is an entrepreneur / motivational / inspirational seeker for a better way of life for one and all to enjoy. I know you desire a better way of life and would like to know more about incredible resources both free and not; so go right ahead and contact me at incaalpacatrail@hotmail.com for more information Warmest regards.
Thomas J. Cummins
Go To Loverian Home PageLove - How to Say Goodbye Forever With Class
By Christina Sponias
When you don't feel for the other person what you used to feel, or when you realize that you never really felt anything for them, but that you only had the impression that they were somehow special and ideal for you, you have to put an end to the relationship.
Without love, what are you doing with him or her? Just living together? If you feel alone while you are with that supposedly special person, you had better really stay alone, and be free to find the right person for you.
Now, the other person loves you. They are "going to die" if you abandon them, and things like that. How can you leave them without being insensitive, rude and cruel?
Of course, you have the right to be free, even if you are married. You can get a divorce. Many times this is necessary, even though we should avoid it if possible.
If you are free and you are simply having a romance, or you are engaged, things are much easier.
If you are married and, especially if you have kids, things are totally different. You have to wait and care about the kids above all. You have to be very serious and responsible. But, you are not a slave. Today, a divorce is a very simple matter, apart from the pain it causes to everyone. At least you are not obliged to bear the mistake you made in getting married when you were too young, for the rest of your life. You are not a prisoner.
I advise you to think carefully about your decisions if you are free, because when you get married things are different from the time when you didn't have obligations. With the wedding, various complications start in your life.
This is why today it is very common to see couples that simply live together instead of getting married.
However, if you want to have a family, you need a wedding. You have to enter into the pattern and follow the rituals, otherwise your relationship will not be as stable. On the other hand, nothing is stable, and perhaps another kind of relationship could be better. There is no recipe for success... Each case is different.
If you want to separate after living with a person for so long, things are very hard, even if you are not married. In this case, you probably feel that your relationship is routine, with no excitement, and this is why you want to be free. If you live with your companion as if you have been married for years, without actually being married, then it's time to wake up and ask yourself if this is what you want from your relationship.
You are tired and you don't know if you love the other person or not. If you have such doubt after many years, this is probably because you don't really love them.
Now, if you have such doubts after a short period of time, things are not so definite. Are you sure you really don't like them? Or are you simply sad, disappointed, and wanting to get rid of the feeling you feel for them? Be sure before you do anything.
If you are sure you want to separate from this person, be sincere. Don't keep them waiting and waiting for a special occasion, the right moment, a favourable situation etc. You have to be delicate but also objective. If you have made your decision, you must advise the other party without delaying forever, because then, when you do find the right person for you, you will suddenly abandon them and this will be considered a betrayal.
If you are not with the person that is supposedly your love, then define your position, because your heart is free and could belong to somebody else, while you are still in the problematic relationship, and then things will be complicated.
You had better tell them what is happening to you. First tell them, and wait. Continue to be with them for a while, as if nothing had happened.
Then, after a few days, talk about this matter again. Explain to them your feelings, ideas, plans, beliefs, everything. Talk with them for hours about everything. Feel sad because this is happening to you both or pretend to be sad if you are not, only because you will hurt the other person if you are cold, and tell them that you want to be free "right now".
Don't fight with them, don't blame them for anything and don't talk about the past or other situations that could get you off the subject.
Be kind and gentle. Tell them that you are going to miss them, but that you need to be alone, that you don't feel good about your relationship. Perhaps it's your fault, perhaps you will meet them again in the future and you'll be together again, but you don't want to continue right now.
You need air, space, freedom and meditation.
Prevent Depression and Craziness through the scientific method of Dream Interpretation discovered by Carl Jung and simplified by Christina Sponias, a writer who continued Jung's research in the unknown region of the human psychic sphere. Learn more at: http://www.booksirecommend.com
Click here and download your copy of the Free ebook
Beating Depression and Craziness
Go To Loverian Home PageAm I In Love? 3 Stunning Ways To Find Out Whether You Are Truly In Love Or Not
By Pushpa Pal Singh
Often we tend to ask ourselves the same question over and over again- Am I really in love? Is this what you call love or is it just mere attraction? Often people confuse love for attraction. You see the difference between love and attraction is that love is a deeper emotion and seems to last forever whereas attraction is just a temporary thing and is short lived. Read on to discover some of the most mind blowing ways to really figure out whether you are in love or not...
Love is a strong emotion- As mentioned above love is always a strong emotion and seems to last almost forever. You see if you are really in love you would feel butterflies in your stomach all the time. It's just not a one time thing. You would have strong desires to really meet the person you love or stay around that person as much as possible.
Love gives you pain- Does it really hurt when the person you love says something hurtful? You see if your love is really true every negative comment made by the person you love would truly hurt you deep. We never take offence when negative comments are made by someone we are just attracted to or just like. But we are truly hurt when our lover makes a negative comment.
Love makes you sacrifice- If you are truly in love than you would be ready to sacrifice almost anything and everything for the one you love. This would be done without any selfish motives and would be out of true inner desire to really do something for the one you love. This is what love truly makes you do.
What you don't know yet- Ever tried to wonder what's in a woman's mind? What is she thinking about? Do you know that women do not always mean what they say? They might say something and mean the exact opposite. But what do women actually want? Do you know there are some secrets women don't want men to know but men absolutely must know these secrets in order to succeed with women? Read on to discover some of the most "Shocking Secrets" women don't want men to know- 9 Most Shocking Secrets Women don't want men to know
Go To Loverian Home PageTuesday, March 11, 2008
The ReunionBy Hannah Nilas
I knew it from the instant I shifted into reverse and started backing up the car. Without a doubt I would have difficulty parallel parking in front of the local diner. But I was determined and persisted until I finally maneuvered the car into position. Not bad I thought, for a woman driver.
As I climbed out of my car, a gentleman approached me. He noticed my hesitant gait, due to a disability, and kindly asked if he could assist me. I thanked him and slipped my hand into his arm. As we began walking to the entrance of the diner, he proceeded to tell me that he and a friend had noticed me struggling to park my car as they sat near the diner's front window.
"We like to watch driver's attempt to parallel park," he said, "and then rank their ability from one to ten, with ten being the best." I smiled and curiously listened as he continued. "When we saw you pulling in, we immediately gave you a grade of three." I looked at him with dismay, but of course he was right! He noticed my expression and quickly added, "However, by the time you finished we agreed that you deserved a nine."
I laughed and replied, "You know, that reminds me of my sixteenth birthday. Parallel parking has plagued me from the start and for weeks prior to my birthday, I worried, with certainty, that I would not park my car properly and, thus, fail to obtain my driver's license. But I was lucky. I did pass and the next day my parent's allowed me to drive the family car to school."
As he had a very pleasant and friendly manner we continued chatting easily. He was in town visiting his friend in order to interview him and write a biography about the friend's life. I was surprised when he mentioned his friend's name and I told him my Father, in fact, had known the man through some business dealings. But that was only the beginning of this coincidence. We reached the front door and I had so enjoyed talking with him that when I thanked him I also spontaneously introduced myself.
But I was shocked when he told me his name. "Kit," I said, "we went to high school together." Of course he looked at me in disbelief. "Really," I blurted out, "West High, 1958."
"You're kidding," he answered and pointed to himself, "Yeah, West High, 1956." We had known each other when we were young. And now by sheer coincidence we had met again. With that we exchanged email addresses and promised to keep in touch.
Go To Loverian Home PageWho Else Want Five Romantic Surprise Ideas?
By R.T. Bucher
Your lover wants you to give them romantic surprise ideas. They want to feel the flames of passion and they truly want you to melt their heart and be swept them off their feet again. With the hectic lifestyles we live, sometimes we forget why we fell in love, remind them today how much you really care. By the time you are finished reading this article you will have the ability to inject the heat back into your relationship.
Try out these five romantic surprise ideas on your lover and see rekindle the waning flames of passion.
- Poetry - A well written poem can move people to emotions they never knew existed. The written word is the most powerful method of communication that exists. Write your lover a poem from your heart and capture their imagination. Not sure if you can write one? Find one from a famous author and read it aloud in front of the fireplace or before a romantic candle light dinner.
- Partner working late - Get a lunchbox or a something like one and fill it with their favorite treats. Spice it up with a sports magazine or a teddy bear, depending on who you want to surprise and deliver it to them at work. Blow them away by writing a heart felt note and tell them something awaits them at home.
- Music - Remember the scene in Say Anything when Lloyd Dobler blared "In Your Eyes" outside the house of his girlfriend. It's a image that is etched in my mind forever. Make a tape of his/her favorite songs, tell them they remind you of them.
- Personal photo - Arranged a photo shoot for just the two of you. Capture your love with an image and go out and shop for the perfect frames together. At the end of the day, top it off with a candle light dinner.
- Children - For those with children, find a sitter or use a in-law and get out in the country for a weekend. Find a nice bed and breakfast and escape for a few days. Allow yourselves to spend time with each other and become reacquainted again.
Now that you are at the end of this article you probably want some more tips to heat the flames of passion. Please visit: Romantic Tips for Couples and discover helpful ideas to rekindle the romance in your relationship.
Go To Loverian Home PageLove Come and Go?
By Greg Rouse
Imagine this. You step up to the counter to place your order. After ogling the menu for several hours, playing the multiple options and combinations in your head you turn your attention to the person behind the counter.
You noticed that there were no prices next to the items on the menu but the place is packed and you are very ready to order. "I'm ready to order" you tell them. "Okay sir, what will it be?" They reply. That's when you do it up. I'll have the number three, take away the original sauce, add this instead, I want it medium to well with all the trimmings.
They punch all that into the register and look back at you with an honest grin. "One Heart Please!" That's right you pay up front. You pull it out, slap it up on the counter and they take it into their possession. "Right this way sir!" They lift the counter bar and bring you into the kitchen. You walk right in and are immediately caught off guard. Everyone who was in line before you was back there in the kitchen slaving over their own orders.
The clerk brings you to your station and tells you "Everything you need to prepare your order will come out here." And before you can prepare yourself here it comes; at a high rate of speed. Pieces are slapping you in the face, they're falling to the floor, they're landing in other customer's stations. So you roll up your sleeves and get to work. Hey, I paid for this! You bust your butt for several months trying to get everything in order. If you had known how much time went into putting it together you would have order something a lot simpler ... like a toss salad.
The days pass by like minutes and weeks like days. You find yourself nearing completion when all of a sudden your order just gets up and leaves your station. That's it, it just stands up and walks away. You struggle to stop it, but have no more energy left. It gets away. Just then you hear the clerk up front tell another customer. "One Heart Please!"
You're standing at your station still ready to "dig in" and you have no order. You look up at the sign hanging over the entry that reads "No Refunds!!" Tell me ... would you want to eat there again?
Maybe I'll get over it, but for now love has left a bitter taste in my mouth.
Greg Rouse is an accomplished martial artist whose experience reaches back into his early childhood. Having practiced and trained in several different styles and techniques over the many years he is well-rounded and ready to share what he has learned. To learn more about what he can do for you in Health & Fitness, Martial Arts Training, Seminars and Special Programs visit http://www.ctctaekwondo.com
He is also a minister in training who loves to reveal Truth to any eager and willing listener. If this is you and you would like to hear more, enter into discussion, schedule a visit or see where he'll be next visit myspace.com and search for heirtohisriches, or stop by the Living the Ministry Community Forums on the internet.
Go To Loverian Home PageBuy, Buy Love
By Rohit Tomar
Men have 14th February, Valentine's Day to prove to their woman how much you love her, and beyond the bedroom! And then there's Women's Day! A day of strategically placed flowers juxtaposed with asexual kisses and respectful, above the shoulder glances. Worse, a day of presents which simply must be thoughtful, intellectually refined and delightful. Belief has it that Newton, while sitting under a tree, was thinking about what to buy for his girlfriend when the apple fell on his head. While this might be a gross exaggeration, the importance of buying your girlfriend the perfect gift in earning you that extra ounce of affection is enormous. But nothing in the world is a more impossible task.
When a girl loves someone, she lets loose upon him her pent up wish list. In all honesty, men find it about as difficult to decipher this list as the Australian cricket team finds it to respect their opponents. Warning: Anything that you buy is certain to be received with one of the following expressions: First, the "My-ex-boyfriend's-orkut-testimonial-was-better-than-your-gift" look that conveys deep disappointment over your stunted creativity. Second, the intense "I-am-not-your-sister" look which articulates her dismay at your disability to differentiate between the various roles of a woman. And finally the grimacing, "What-a-cheapskate" look that basically ensures that your sex life falls out of your pants through the recently created hole in your pocket.
The inherent capacity of a woman to point out the minutest defect in the gift that you buy makes the process all the more difficult. You may buy her flowers but they may be of a lighter shade than her sofa covers or you may end up gifting her chocolates. No one knows the truth behind the perfect gift-a woman's brain may be the world's most closely guarded secret.
A friend of mine once bought his girlfriend a stuffed toy dolphin for Valentine's Day. His argument was that a dolphin stands as a symbol of friendship in troubled waters and is the most intelligent amongst its counterparts. She subjected the dolphin to caustic, destructive criticism. He had forgotten the"obvious" fact that noise made by dolphins stand as an affront to her singing abilities. She dumped him.
So then, what do we buy our ladies?Do we buy everything we can think of and hope that they like something?The answer to some of these questions emerged from the lips of a female friend recently, "Anyone can be hard to shop for if you don't know anything about them, "she said. So fellow men, let's get to know our women. Talk to them about things they like and dislike. Spend time with them fawning over the latest design of a pretty necklace. Let's burn the midnight oil reading magazines. We will grit our-teeth, go shopping with them to decode the impossible. You get the picture!
He has an affiliate marketing experience of two years. Read more: http://www.articlescart.com
Go To Loverian Home PageWednesday, March 5, 2008
Turn Friends Green with Envy, as You Constantly Have a Stream of Beautiful Women Around YouBy Pushpa Pal Singh
So how would you like to become the man no woman can ever say no to? How would you like to become the one who scores big with all the beautiful ladies all the time? How would you like to be the one who others envy only due to your astonishing talent of attracting any and every girl at will? Well if you want to become all this can read on to discover some of the most mind blowing ways using which you can have any and every woman you desire...
Do what others aren't willing to do- You see the major problem most guys have in the society is the fear of approach. They fear rejection so much that they don't even bother approaching a random female and someone else goes and takes the advantage of the opportunity when they are left staring. You see the best possible way to get women is to start taking action. You see your first few attempts might not bring you any results but with time you would develop a strong sense of self confidence using which you will be able to get any girl you desire.
Become popular among them- Another best way to have a lot of girls around you is to become popular among them. The best possible way to do this is to become great with words. You see men who are good communicators always get women no matter what they look like.
Don't try to hit on them- You see another major reason why some men are never able to get anywhere with women is that they try to hit on them constantly. You see women get hit on a lot by a lot of men from all over the place therefore the trick here is not to hit on them rather just to start having a random conversation and take it from there.
An absolute must know for you- This secret is an absolute must know for you no matter what. This is the grand daddy of all which would give you the ultimate power to become a magnet towards which every woman would be attracted. This is only known to a few and you are one of the lucky one's who are being introduced to this shocking secret click here- Tell me the Secret
Go To Loverian Home PageCan't There Be A BOY FRIEND? Does It Always Have To Be A BOYFRIEND?
By Manisha Paul
I watched a few Chinese drama, especially those TVB ones, or Chinese movies. There are always stories about a girl and a guy, who are very close but not lovers. It's always either the girl or the guy have their own partner, but then the girl and the guy are close. Sometime they end up falling in love, sometime they're just friends.
Now this kinda story happens to me. I have a friend, a guy who is quite close to me. Yes, just "quite", not "so" or "very". We are just friends. I have a steady boyfriend(this time I mean partner) But then again, my friends always tease me about him. We never met for dinner or movie. He's never visited my home, neither I've ever been to his place.
Is it just because of we always talk to each other regarding a lot of common interest? Or is it because of I helped him choosing his career path? Or maybe because he always asked me about suggestions on professional courses when there were many others to ask to? We participate in all common meets and my friends end up saying "You won't go anywhere without him".
I've talked to few close friends of mine who are already married and learned that it is dangerous to have a close boy friend after marriage as my partner will surely have objections. It's not that he does not know about my friend, but he has never said anything specifically. But may be he'll start minding once he ties up the knot finally.
It's also a very common phrase that "after a certain age, boys and girls cannot be just friends, there has to be some kind of special chemistry between them". Isn't that pretty strange as we try to define age limit for an eternal term like friendship?
Manisha Paul is a regular blogger at Batchmates.com Manisha has her own blog at Batchmates Blog and is an active member of that site. |  |
Go To Loverian Home PageHow To Revive The Sweet Love You Once Enjoyed
By Francis K Githinji
The fire is long gone and burnt out. What remains now are just embers from the cold ashes. Evidence that there was once a hot and consuming fire. The love was hot and the relationship was blossoming at an excellent rate. What remains now is a sour taste in the mouth and maybe a dull thud in your mind whenever you reflect on it. Can the threads that once tied you so tightly be picked? Is it possible to revive the sweet love you Once knew? There is nothing that is impossible in this troubled planet. You can stop talking about your love life in past tense and switch it to drive mode where you will be referring to it in present tense. Prepare all your body faculties, physically and psychologically to rejuvenate and revive the sweet love you Once knew. Gather all your energy for a common goal and purpose, to refurbish and rehabilitate your lost love, to give it a face lift, a new lease of life.
Identify what used to connect you. Maybe it was the area of common goals and interests in life that used to connect you together. Use them to your advantage and revive the sweet love you Once knew. Maybe you used to share the same ideologies, desires and dreams. This are very key areas in a persons life. You could sit down more often in a quiet place and start sharing and exchanging ideas just like you used to. You will find that when you share common interests there will be so much to talk about that actually you will fail to notice how time has flown by. You will spend more and more time together and you cannot rule out fondness developing between you. The only consistent thing in this world is change either for the better or for the worse. Spending so much time together will initiate a healing process so long as what brought division earlier does not rear its ugly head.
There are those areas that both of you really liked to visit. For instance your favorite coffee shop where you used to have coffee dates or the cinema you used to frequent. There are also the picnic sites and the routes you used to take together either for a walk or on horse back. Romance was at its peak then. Try to retrace this romance path and rediscover your love, the sweet love you Once knew. Make sure you hit the discovery trail with your partner, it will bring the memories flooding back. It will soften your partners stand point. Your partner can even see the necessity of reviving the love. Lighting the fire once more and making a commitment of keeping this fire burning.
Initiate talks to try and clear the stalemate. Discuss with your partner on what is ailing your relationship. Investigate what killed the spark because it is no lo9nger there. Be honest and humble enough to accept your mistakes if you were the contributing factor to the breakdown. Such a confession will melt your partners heart and pave way for reconciliation. Propose for an enactment of a new chapter in your relationship. A relationship that will be more accommodative and fulfilling and the dream of reviving the sweet love you Once knew will come